I know what you’re thinking.  I’m just a lowly cup of joe, lacking conscious emotion and awareness.  But this is not the case. You see, I do feel. I feel a lot. I feel pain, and grief and sorrow just like everybody else.  And just because I...

Great, just great. Somebody let it slip to Noam Chomsky that you were having a party in your apartment and he’s here bumming everybody out. As if you didn’t need one more thing to worry about while hosting, someone brought the eminent American...

People go on and on about how dangerous guns are, but what about all the uses of owning a firearm that don’t involve shooting? Here are 5 crafts you can make at home using just your AR-15, a little duct tape, and a dash of liberal tears. Let’s...

I bet you think you’re slick, huh? Sliding in under the radar, stealing one of our national holidays? Well not so fast you ignorant Americans. Before you can celebrate St. Patrick’s day with the rest of us true Irishmen, you must first prove...

Unbelievable! In the latest in a centuries-long string of abject failures of the judicial system, Tyler was forced to clean up after his and his twin’s shared birthday party, even though it was his brother Danny who created the lion’s share of...

Uh-oh, does it smell like teen spirit in here? That’s right, this kid’s rocking a Nirvana t-shirt. Man, if only Kurt Cobain were around to see this now. His name is Jacob Lomes and he is everything. Jacob picked this puppy up from Target at the...

In life, there’s some things you just can’t do. You can’t take your seatbelt off on the highway and stick your head through the sunroof. You can’t throw Molotov cocktails at your douchebag neighbor’s house just because he throws...