1. Unexpected You know, when it comes to replacement words, this one is a classic option. Can’t go wrong here. So long, ninth use of “surprising” in my ethics paper—“unexpected” is takin’ over. 2. Startling This one is perfect...
Woah there! Heads up! Get your engines revving and your gaskets oiled, because that guy in your philosophy 232 section is coming in with a HOT take in today’s ethics discussion. There may be mere minutes left in class, but you’d be a fool to...
About time! Looks like this sicko is finally joining the rest of us in the twenty first century. Tired of watching celiacs and otherwise allergic children miss out on the joys of trick-or-treating and the horrific realization of slicing their little...
Dennis—11 years In middle school, Dennis was notorious for finding pennies behind the ears of other students. He spent 11 years in prison for grand theft auto. Stanley—13 years Stanley was quite the talented magician in the sixth grade, notable...
Look, we’ve all been there. Day in and day out it’s the same thing: hand to cup, water to cup, cup to mouth, mouth to water. Every. Damn. Time. Don’t you wish there was a better way? Well friends, I have good news. It’s the lifehack that has...
Talk about best friends forever! Nick Hess and Nina Goldberg go way back. Like, all the way to the start of college. They love all the same things: the same foods, the same movies, and even the same styles. And now, four years after they met, Nick...
Most Trees Unless it’s some bullshit little baby tree, there’s a solid chance that, like, 98% of all the trees on the planet are taller than your grandpa. Fuck you. Statues of Dead People Hell, even a statue of an alive person probably has 2...