Sources report that Jeremy Donley, who recently experienced a breakup, had successfully replaced his ex-girlfriend with a brand new succulent. The succulent, acquired from a nearby ACE Hardware,...

I was craning my neck over my bulging bicep and noticed you carrying a bag of groceries that looked a little larger than normal. I want you to know I spent months building up my muscles, and I...

Hey, you wanna know what felt even better than going flawless in that free-for-all just now? It was last night, when I fucked your mom. Oh, what’s that over there? I think she left her bra on...

I promise you — he looks better in person. Pictures just don’t do him justice! I mean, come on, would I really have dated him this summer if he wasn’t cute? He’s just not photogenic. I...

Are you looking for something? Just think about all of the places it could be, I mean, where did you last set it? It has to be somewhere around this apartment, you wouldn’t even...

Fisherman Dane Lewis set a personal record this past Tuesday when he reeled in a 14-foot, 1,800-pound Beluga whale at Shedd Aquarium in Chicago, Illinois. While always a fan of freshwater...

Reports from the University of Michigan Parkour Club meeting last week confirmed the gathering as nothing more than 30 minutes of jerking it to dope buildings. “We started off with...