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Have You Met Erasmus?

Hello, there. Don’t be alarmed: you’ll spook my dear friend,...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Mom, Can You Come Pick Me Up, There’s People Drinking Here

Mom, remember how you said to call you in case of emergency? Well I...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Oh You’re A Comedian? Tell Me A Joke!

Hey there! How’s it going? I may have heard through the grapevine...

  • Feb 21, 2019

2019 Oscars To Honor Year’s Best Movies And Bohemian Rhapsody

As awards season comes to a close, this year’s Oscars ceremony...

  • Feb 21, 2019

It Sure Is Cold Out There

What floor? No problem. Well, boy it sure is freezing out there...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Teenager Hires Babysitter For Divorced Dad

Before attending a local house party this past Friday, 16-year-old...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Change Jar Almost Fucking Full, Baby

Citing that the day he had been waiting for was almost upon him,...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Silent Consensus Blames Fart On Ugliest Person In Room

Noting that there were no other conclusions that would suit all...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Five-Second Rule Amended For Special Circumstance

Claiming that there comes a time for all legislation to be revised,...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Man Who Owns A Pug Claims Gay Marriage Unnatural

Despite owning a four-year-old pug, the product of centuries of...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Nation’s Dwindling Middle Class Reduced To Jeremy

With the wealth gap becoming wider than ever over recent years, the...

  • Feb 21, 2019

Bad News: Your Blood Test Revealed You Have Blood

Uh oh, you might wanna sit down for this one. Your blood test results...

  • Feb 21, 2019
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