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Caucasian, middle aged male

German Man Thinks He’s Important Despite Silly Little Accent

  • Apr 22, 2021
Mechanic showing female customer the problem with her car

Mechanic Just Has One Extra Thing To Suggest Real Quick

On a trip to get a routine oil change, local woman Sarah Norris was...

  • Apr 22, 2021
Happy woman putting on facial moisturizer with hand in bathroom mirror

“April Showers, Brings May Flowers,” Reports Woman Named April Preparing For Date

Sources confirm that local woman April Patterson was seen hurrying...

  • Apr 22, 2021
swift album

New Taylor Swift Album Gives “All The Feels” About Middle School Boyfriend

Taylor Swift fans are reporting that “Fearless (Taylor’s...

  • Apr 22, 2021
A pretentious looking man standing in front of a whiteboard

Ross Student Boyfriend Prepares To Ask To Waste of Your Time In Exchange For 0% Equity

Ross junior Michael Moren drafted a proposal yesterday formally...

  • Apr 22, 2021
Discontent man at taped-off crime scene

Grizzled Detective Thought He’d Seen It All Till This One

Local police detective John Thompson reported this week to colleagues...

  • Apr 22, 2021
Man working at computer

Study Finds Inverse Relationship Between Male Skill At Microsoft Excel And Oral Sex

Researchers at the University of Delaware announced this weekend the...

  • Apr 22, 2021
Image of President Biden photoshopped with lower opacity

Sickly Pale Biden Vows To Be Most Transparent President Ever

In a Rose Garden speech on government ethics, President Joe Biden...

  • Apr 22, 2021
A man in an orange jumpsuit behind the gates of the Ann Arbor Football Stadium.

Ann Arbor Prisoner Certain He Sent To Wrong Big House

This past Tuesday, the Ann Arbor Police Department allegedly received...

  • Apr 22, 2021
A lavender scented pig that looks in disarray.

Lavender-Infused Stuffed Animal No Match For Area Woman’s Tuesday Night Freakout

The lavender scented plush pig belonging to junior Paula Webster was...

  • Apr 22, 2021
Split image of Kevin Jonas and vaccine vial

Johnson And Johnson Voted Kevin Jonas Of Vaccines

The American public has voted Johnson and Johnson the “Kevin Jonas...

  • Apr 22, 2021

E3W Summer Style Guide

  • Apr 22, 2021
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