• No menu assigned!
"Better than sex,
   twice as often."
The Every Three Weekly
  • Campus
  • National
  • World
  • Sports
  • Opinion
  • Infographics
  • The Click House
  • Encyclopedia
  • Newsletter
Every Three Weekly

Waiter taking a group's order at a table
Long reportedly coasted through his entire shift on Table 44’s kind compliment.
National

Waiter Taking Order For “Well Done” Steak Happy To Hear He Doing Good Job

A local waiter is pleased to hear he is doing a good job after taking an order for a steak “well done.” Benjamin Long was recently hired as a waiter at The Prancing Horse. “I was so happy to...

  • Apr 13, 2022
Someone's furrsona
Smith later laughed at a tweet made by a Brony.
National

Great Joke On Twitter Made By Furry

According to recent reports, a great joke that was posted on Twitter has been discovered to have been posted by a furry. The revelation was made by new Twitter user Sharon Smith who reportedly did...

  • Apr 13, 2022
Woman looking at phone and laughing
Conwell’s friends reportedly called 911 after she was “totally dying right now.”
National

Woman “Sent Into Orbit” By Joke Becomes First Person On Mars

LSA Junior Alison Conwell made history as the first person on Mars after she was “sent into orbit” by a joke. Conwell was reportedly launched into space by a message sent to her by her friend...

  • Apr 13, 2022
child looking at toys in a barnes and noble
Amazon also plans to return to “just books” following the success of Barnes & Noble’s move.
National

Barnes And Noble To Reintroduce Books In Stores

Nationally recognized toystore Barnes and Noble announced plans to reintroduce books into their stores. “We figured it was time to bring books back into the mix,” stated company CEO James Daunt....

  • Apr 13, 2022
Mount St Helens Erupting
National

Mount St. Helens Taking Its Goddamn Time

  • Apr 13, 2022
The University of Michigan commencement ceremony.
“I’ve read Mockingjay. I know how this is going to go down,” said Lemmings.
Campus

Class Of 2022 Still Unsure If Commencement Some Kind Of Trap 

University of Michigan seniors in the Class of 2022 have reported hesitancy about the upcoming in-person commencement ceremony, claiming that it could be “some kind of trap.”  Following the...

  • Apr 12, 2022
A man wearing a graduation cap.
“15 days of school left to go!” said Trainor, despite a decade of further school in his future.
Campus

“I Can’t Wait To Graduate,” Says Senior About To Pursue Masters And PhD For Next Ten Years 

During his weekly Facetime call with his mom this Tuesday, Engineering senior Philip Trainor emphatically claimed that he “can’t wait to graduate” at the end of this semester, despite the fact...

  • Apr 12, 2022
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • 6
3 OF 365

COPYRIGHT 2016 E3W. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

  • About
  • Apply To Join The Every Three Weekly
  • Contact
  • Encyclopedia
  • Home
  • Legal Disclaimer
  • Newsletter